Dorm room beds are too small, reports the Washington Post. But don’t hold your breath waiting for Georgetown’s administrators to follow AU’s lead and start equipping campus housing with double beds — our impenetrable housing bureaucracy, combined with the official party line prohibiting cohabitation will keep you in the cramped cot until graduation (or at least until you move off-campus).

-Anna Bank, editorial board chair

The people who run the Georgetown Canal have noticed you’re getting fat, and they’ve come up with a solution: guided walking tours of the canal, with prizes. You can wreck the process, though, by cheating like a fiend.

You see, prizes are awarded to whoever walks the most miles, but the score is based on an online spreadsheet. There’s nothing keeping you from winning the tennis shoes, park service badge, or whatever they’re handing out. [Ed. note: I don’t trust Will as far as I can throw him]. I doubt this guy will be waiting for you at the end of each 30 minute walk.

If robbing senior citizens of their plaudits isn’t your thing, marvel at the canal administrators’ loose definition of what it means to “walk” something. If you walk all 7 weeks, you’ll have walked 185 miles. That means big things, apparently: “Why 185 miles? The C&O Canal NHP actually runs 185 miles from Georgetown all the way to Cumberland, MD. If your team walks 185 miles in the next seven weeks, you can say you walked the entire Canal!”

That seems like a gross exaggeration of your achievement. I’ve swam a good amount in my life, but I don’t say I’ve swam the entire English Channel.

-Will Sommer, blog editor. Flickr photo from user Absolutwade