Taxi Commissioner Leon Swain is a gruff man, but given the risks he faces on a daily basis, like mayoral purges so regular he can never be far from his heat, you can’t blame him. If he has to get a little icy sometimes just to cool down, who are we to judge?

Not all of Swain’s duties are so high-stakes, though. He also has to attend public comment sessions and experience all the little cuts they put in his vitality. Case in point: last June’s public comments (PDF).

In the minutes, Swain wrestles with cab drivers complaining about fare price, makes a woman speak last because he knows she’s a talker, and suspects one speaker of having a heart attack. Near the end of the meeting, Swain resigns himself to the drudgery necessary to drag a town into the new century:

Right now I realize that a lot of people are not happy. My phone numbers and everything else, my address, everything is public record. I have not changed my phonenumber. I have not taken my number out of the  telephone book. I get calls day and night. Some are very disgusting. Some don’t bother me at all. But guess what? That’s what happens.

Emphasis mine. I hope you appreciate those meters.

It’s Friday, and I’m feeling a whole lot better about the future than I was yesterday. Work-mandated happy hour is in three hours (and counting!), but mojitos and Merlot are not my only motivators. Instead, my heart is cheered by the tale of Kara Ross (COL ‘88), whose jewelry is featured in this month’s Elle UK.

Ross took her love for shiny things to a level most women only dream of–she got a degree in glitz…or gemology, to use the official term. Her stuff is actually pretty cool, even if Elle chose to feature some some rather bizarre handcuffy, nautical-themed bracelets.

In case you want to date Kara, according to her bio she likes “relaxed elegance, high quality and good manners.” Large gems, too. Go get ‘er boys; she sounds real low-maintenance.

Photo from Kara Ross

What with Eliot Spitzer’s sexual adventures and the fascinating prospect of a fictionalized account of Laura Bush’s sex life, these past few months have lived up to Washington’s storied history of trysts and tits. I mean, that’s why you chose a college here, right?

The best is yet to come, though, as long as your “best” has to be pseudo-pornographic.

HBO has just announced that it will shortly begin the filming of a pilot episode for Washingtonienne, a TV series based upon former Senate staffer Jessica Cutler’s District sexploits, which she so prudently parlayed into a chick-lit novel. The buzz promises to basically be a new Sex and the City, but given that it’s set in DC, the clothes will be frumpier.