Jack Evans, Georgetown’s councilman, is facing off against Cary Silverman in September’s Democratic primary. He’ll need to pull out all the stops to beat Silverman, so he’s asking for a little help from the ladies. From an email invitation to one of Jack’s fundraising parties last week:

“We have given out over 150 free tickets to some high quality women. Please come have some drinks, food, and support Jack.”

Emphasis mine. Either Jack had the women seduce partygoers, then blackmail them for more campaign cash, or he’s matched the women with his donors using a careful formula invented by Dr. Neal Clark Warren. They’ll have kids, and those kids, owing Evans their existence, will feel obligated to donate to him in 2027 for his next campaign.

Flickr photo from user Fashion Fights Poverty DC used under a Creative Commons license. Via City Desk.

A PCC student explains how to make eye babies

I know it’s a bummer when your Thursday night hookup comes to a crashing halt because Mullah Jack doesn’t want condoms sold on campus, but religion could still make your college life a lot worse. How much worse? For that, the Chronicle of Higher Ed journeyed to Pensacola Christian College, a school so conservative it says Bob Jones University is too liberal.

The school’s in the news because one of its alums is involved in the Justice Department hiring scandal. Someone who enforces our laws was subject to some pretty bizarre ones herself, including:

•  No talking between men and women outside chaperoned areas
• No inter-sex handshaking
• No movies
• No “optical intercourse” (staring hard at someone). This is, delightfully, called “making eyes babies”.

Students who break those rules are subjected to bizarre punishments, which including not talking to anyone of the opposite sex or not leaving campus for two weeks. The craziest, being shadowed, forces you to live in your RA’s room for a couple days, follow them everywhere, and talk only to them.

Whenever I hear about repressive schools like this, I imagine myself as a sort of Kevin Bacon in Footloose, smuggling in copies of Halo and Harry Potter and teaching the students (and yes, eventually the teachers) how to kick free of their squarish restraints. It’s not worth the effort, though, because the place isn’t even accredited.

Flickr photo from lady_lbrty used under a Creative Commons license . Via Tbogg.

Realizing how much the kids love texting, what with the Twitter, DC police chief Cathy Lanier has wisely decided to let people text crime tips to the police. Even better, the number–50411–is inspired by street slang that calls snitching “putting the 5-0 to the 411″. Next time you see a suspicious package, you can feel just like Bubbles.

Via We Love DC