Date Lab Rat: The choosy chosen
I can say with 99% certainty that the Date Labbers who set up this week’s date are not Jewish. Both of the daters are technically members of the tribe, but they’re clearly on different planes in terms of religious observance, and anyone who’s seen Fiddler on the Roof would have been able to tell that this match was doomed from the start.
He’s hardcore observant–keeps kosher, wears a yarmulke, visits Israel once a year–and she’s far from it (“[Inside, the women were] all wearing skirts and have multiple children, because that’s what Orthodoxish people do. I’m wearing my skinny jeans, my boobs are hanging out, and I’m going, Oh, this is mortifying.”) He wants a Crown Heights-style shidduch date followed closely by marriage and kids (“I’m [almost] 26, and I do have some pressure and some personal desire to have kids in the near future”) and she couldn’t be more terrified by that (“Dude, I’m 24; I’m not ready.”)
Surprisingly enough, the date is a total failure.
Rating: 3-4. Even though this was a painfully awkward encounter, I’m a sucker for anything Jewish, so I got a kick out of it. But aside from that it was pretty par for the course.
Chances of Success: 0. He’ll definitely have at least two kids with names like Chana and Rivka by the time she’s starting to maybe think about moving in with someone.