Date Lab Rat: What the hell is a nittany lion, anyway?
I’m starting to think that Date Lab is biased in favor of girls who like college sports. It’s as if caring (or pretending to care) about your alma mater’s football team somehow makes you automatically down-to-earth and date-ready.
The girl in this week’s date fits the mold perfectly: “I’m a huge sports fan. I can sit down with the boys and watch football and keep up!” An exclamation point?! She must mean business.
But a shared love of SportsCenter does not a love connection make. Despite consciously shying away from jeans and choosing a sweater/leggings/boots combo instead, she’s doomed from the start: he’s looking for a “blonde in pearls and polka dots.”
Fortunately, they manage to talk football for long enough to keep the date from being awkward, although her Penn State-ophilia hurts more than it helps: Alabama fan Ben rates the date a 4.157, but says that “it could have been a 4.16 if she wasn’t such a big Penn State fan.” Unfortunately for us, that’s the funniest thing either of them says in the whole column.
Rating: 2. Post commenter ASmallBlue said it best: “B-O-R-I-N-G…individually, together, B-O-R-I-N-G.” Right on, Blue.
Chances of Success: 1. He got her number and said they’d hang out as friends, but sometimes “I’ll call you” is just one of those things you say to avoid an awkward silence, and I think this was one of those times.