Dowdometer: Hot, Flat, and Dowded (also, naked Pat)
Posted by: Will Sommer in News, Vox Populi, tags: Dowdometer, GUSA, GUSA Summer Fellows, Pat Dowd
Time for the last reading of the Dowdometer, the machine that measures now-former GUSA President Pat Dowd’s success at living up to low expectations. The red bar is my expectations.
Pat grew his mustache today because he’s looking to live the life only available to Thomas Friedman. Describing his trip to Finland, Pat said (emphasis added):
“I got a Thomas Friedman level of access when I was there to ask questions. The trip was really cool, because I got a chance to take all the theory and conceptual stuff I learned at Georgetown and apply it to a real issue,” Dowd said.
I don’t know about that, but if “Thomas Friedman level of access” means stripping down to your birthday suit, here is Pat Dowd naked. The Dowdometer was very pleased when I fed that JPEG into its disk drive, so that may account for the sky-high rating today.
Cheesecake shots aside, Pat surpassed my expectations this year by a pretty good margin. I pulled for the Williams-Kesten ticket in the last GUSA election (the same Kesten who later became Georgetown’s most media-savvy student, besides Pat). When Pat and James Kelly won, I was not only surprised, but filled with foreboding.
His reign wasn’t perfect. Pat turned us all into petty pumpkin thieves, and he has an inexplicable love for internet censorship (a love perhaps stoked by the rascally Dowdometer). But darn it, he was a pretty good GUSA president. Let’s run down Pat’s successes:
- Trying to save the Hindi language program.
- Launching GUSA Summer Fellows, which not only still exists, but has doubled in size.
- Having no really serious screw-ups.
- Skilfully handling James Kelly’s chameleon-like hair style.
So it has been a pretty good term both for Pat and the Dowdometer, which chronicled him at his most festive and his most pumpkin-like. It is with a heavy heart that I say goodbye, Dowd and Dowdometer, and hello, Angert and Angertoscope.
Photo Illustration by Hunter Kaplan
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Angertoscope? http://academic.pgcc.edu/ent/ENT%20171%20Online%20Project/oscope1.JPG
Let’s hope Angert sticks in the peaks and not the troughs.
Whoa, oscopes look even cooler than I thought.
[...] could be better than Pat Dowd’s (SFS `09) bizarre trip to Finland which gave us Friedman-like access to the nude image of our former student body President? Why, his Finnish embassy [...]
[...] relatively high. High given his year of experience in Pat’s administration, which ended on a shockingly successful note, we’re reasonably [...]