Faux-tipster raises questions about Jack DeGioia’s proclivities

Like any other campus media outlet, we receive a fair number of tips, but for the most part they’re just requests to promote a club’s event or solicitations from outside companies trying to get us to shill their product. So when we get a tip that breaks that pattern, we’re generally pretty psyched.

A couple months ago Vox received a cryptic “tip” from someone calling themselves Robert Quincy Kendall, telling us he had “sensitive information” that would be “highly damaging to the university’s reputation.” Curiosity piqued, we asked him to clarify.

For two months, nothing. Then, earlier this week, we finally received another email from the mysterious (and almost certainly fictitious) Mr. Kendall:

I understand that it has been over two months since my last communiqué, and for this I apologize wholeheartedly. Unfortunately, I have been the target of an increasing campaign to discredit my name because of the information I have come into contact with.

I am afraid, however, that I can no longer remain silent, even at the cost of my own reputation and academic future. I have no choice but to pass on to you the secrets that my comrades and I have risked everything to obtain. The scanned document attached to this email was procured from the sealed files of the Jesuit community. Its fate, and indeed the very fate of our academy, now rest with your magazine.

I know you did not ask to bear this burden … but those who serve in the name of truth are always rewarded with the grace of God. I cannot force your hand to publish anything — I only ask that you do what you think is best, but I sincerely hope that our sacrifices have not been in vain.

Veritas Est Enim Pax,
Robert Quincy Kendall

So what is this scanned document, “procured from the sealed files of the Jesuit community”? Find out after the jump!

DeGioia Confession Letter(Click on letter to enlarge)

Looks like we’ve either discovered the true identity of the infamous “Cuddler” and President DeGioia has some serious explaining to do; or, more likely, there’s some Georgetown student out there with way too much time on his hands this summer. Props to “Mr. Kendall” for the attention to detail on the “official” university letter (the seal, the signature, the scanner shaddow marks!), and for brightening up Vox‘s inbox!

8 Comments on “Faux-tipster raises questions about Jack DeGioia’s proclivities

  1. This is awesome! Thanks for publishing.

    -though I would have expected a hologram message “This is our most desperate hour. Help me Vox Populi you’re my only hope.”

  2. This is awesome. My first thought, to be honest was that maybe the Hoya finally attempted to exact revenge for our pranks. If that’s true, then 1) clearly the Voice staff isn’t that gullible, but 2) good job on crafting a ridiculously hilarious letter. Kudos.

    If it’s not, then there’s someone out there with way too much time.

  3. Jack DeGioia impersonator Jack Stuef said he didn’t know anything about the letter, interestingly.

  4. You are all mistaken. I assure you this is no joke. You must heed my warnings and not mock them as the mad ravings of an intern with copious amounts of time. This man must be stopped!

  5. Does the Voice even pretend to be a newspaper anymore?

  6. This is extremely offensive and right up there with anything in last spring’s infamous Hoya “satire” issue. Sexual assault is not a joke – especially when many members of our community have been victims of the “Cuddler” – and whatever the context Dr. DeGioia, a committed family man, does not deserve to be associated with the disgusting crimes the “Cuddler” has committed.

    Shame on the person who wrote this and on the Voice for printing it.

  7. Pingback: A “Georgetown Cuddler” Timeline - The Sexist - Washington City Paper

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