If you weren’t convinced that you can buy absolutely anything on the internet, check out Best Friends For Fake, a website started by two recent Georgetown graduated that will rent you friends so you can make a good first impression on people—and make friends.
“Our flock of thespian thoroughbreds draw on decades worth of theatrical experience,” the site boasts, “whether it be formal training at the National Conservatory of Arts, or years of performance as a Parisian mime (seriously!)”
Unfortunately, not seriously. This site was put together by Thrillist as an April Fools’ Day prank, which really bummed out Vox.
But what really hurt us is that Thrillist chose Georgetown graduates to be the entrepreneurs marketing the skills of “Super Prep” (“Whether it’s administering advice on pairing boat shoes with seersucker, or administering advice on proper ground ball technique from his days playing UVA club lax…”), “Aggro Hipster” (“After a recent relocation from Brooklyn (‘way too commercial’), Sara now crashes in an H Street studio in the basement of a former artisan donut-sprinkle specialty shop. Whatever.”), and “Quickly Drunk Traveling Business Man.”
Maybe it’s just that this Thrillist author went to Georgetown (which would explain the uncanny knowledge of prep-ism), but come on. Would Georgetown grads ever really try to sell you something so tacky, frivolous, and in the case of “Super Prep,” unbearably preppy?
And then we remembered College Polos, the company that recent Georgetown graduates JP Medved (MSB ‘09) and Anthony Sessa (SFS ‘09) started which sells polo shirts with beer pong, ‘shocker,’ and boob insignias.