What sucks: Tombs trivia’s most offensive team names

Or, “The most shameful Tombs trivia team names that the Georgetown community should be ashamed of but probably isn’t.” But that wouldn’t fit in the title. Either way, today we present to you Vox‘s newest feature, designed to celebrate the lowest common denominator of Hoya humor as exemplified by the most stellar team names juniors and seniors selected for Monday night Tombs trivia.

So, without further tongue-clicking:

The winner: No means yes, and yes means anal. Among the high forms of comedy—satire, parody, irony—cracks at rape surely rank as the highest.

Second place: Number of stairs I kicked my girlfriend down when she told me she was pregnant. The lily-livered, PC wimp seated beside me said he hoped that this was a seriously misguided reference to Gone With the Wind. Psssh! If there’s a joke about relationship abuse that isn’t funny, I haven’t heard it.

Runners up: Will someone please change the channel from women’s basketball. Capitally hilarious, especially since the Georgetown women’s basketball team sadly, yet inevitably, lost during the NCAA tournament. Number of guys you have to blow to be a Miller Lite girl. A winning compliment to the hosts of the game, Bud Light. More like Gay-daffi. It’s funny because … gay!

If I missed a real zinger, please share in the comments. And until next week, Hoya Saxa!

94 Comments on “What sucks: Tombs trivia’s most offensive team names

  1. There is nothing inconsistent about abhorring rape and violence against women while at the same time getting a little laugh out of a silly, offensive trivia team name that plays on those two things. They’re funny precisely because the topic is so wrong, and the names are kind of stupid, and they make people shake their heads and chuckle “Wow, that’s wrong and kind of stupid.” If we were all desensitized to rape and violence and consider them trivial (which is what those who are offended seem to posit), then a joke about rape would be as empty and bland as a joke about the billion other trivial things/actions that mean nothing to us and that don’t get laughs at a bar (e.g., celery, used cars, asphalt, airplanes, crutches, staplers, clouds, picnic benches, bowling, juggling, having pleasant conversations, eating, running, watching TV). The very reason the names get laughs is because the subject matter, at its core, appals the vast, vast majority of people, and so such casual, flippant references are unexpected and absurd.

    Moreover, drawing entertainment from something does not condone anything about it. Does “Anchor Man” condone a culture of poor journalism? Does “Titanic” condone the building of inferior ships? Does “Twelfth Night” condone cross-dressing and deception (with sexy results)? Does “Hop on Pop” condone the act of jumping up and down on one’s father? Does “Sesame Street” condone living in a trash can or befriending a 9-foot-tall bird?

    Let’s get a grip, people.

  2. Students who came up with \Gay-daffi\: please report to my office Friday to be expelled from the SFS.

    That is all, students.

  3. My favorite part about this is the hippies bitching about \a rape culture\ which I’m sure no one can explain to me are the same liberals lobbying for extended furlough programs for convicted felons and the elimination of life sentencing. Yeah, but drunk people at Tombs are the real problem.

    When did we all get so sensitive? Laugh if you want to, don’t if you don’t. Who are you people to draw the line? Who are you to determine moral piety? Comedians like Carlin, Pryor, Hicks, Maher, Chapelle, Dangerfield…allll made successful careers and earned spots in American culture by marginalizing and degrading various races, women, and religions. Why? Because people laugh.

    So here are the two constants: 1) I don’t care if you think I have a disgusting sense of humor. 2) Anyone can find anything offensive. So I’ll end this by saying the most offensive things aren’t rape jokes or sexist remarkts…it’s Dane Cook fans.

  4. I’m really bummed I didn’t see any of you at Rhino last night…

  5. @peanut allergy, first off, I explicitly said that rape and abuse are different than being short. I realize being short (generally) lacks a violent past that inherently accompanies rape and abuse. But what about the people who were beat up and bullied because they were smaller than everyone else? Is there then more of a connection? (No, I’m not saying it will be on the same level of how traumatic the other two are, but this is an analogy and I hope you can see that both can be mentally and emotionally scarring). The connection is two-part: 1. There is a similar “sting” that is felt when someone insults or offends something about your person or something that has happened to you that you might not be comfortable with, and 2) that it is in fact something that is part of who you are and what you’ve experienced. Like @mike said, laugh if you want to, don’t if you don’t. I agree that many of the names are dumb and a poor attempt at humor, but that doesn’t mean they’re offensive.

  6. Here’s one for next week:

    My couch might pull out, but I don’t.

  7. Hoyas Suck!
    The humor is juvenile.
    The basketball team is a bunch of chokers.
    The coach should be fired.
    The newspaper should get serious and quit printing this crap.
    The Tombs management should throw the bums out.

  8. @That guy Not nearly offensive enough and already been done. #stepyourgameup

  9. This is relatively simple. Everyone who has read this now knows that these jokes hurt a lot of people at Georgetown. Like anything else, you can choose to ignore that information. But the people that have been hurt can’t choose to not feel pain. If you didn’t know the magnitude of gender violence (against women and LGBT) in this community, now you do. If you don’t care, I think you should ask yourself why not.

  10. Lots of Muslims get upset about images of Mohammad: does that mean we should stop drawing them???

  11. Interesting that you draw that comparison. Derogatory images of Muhammed come from a place of ignorance and intolerance and are often used to scandalize Islam. Similarly, jokes about rape come from a place of ignorance and misogyny–which begs the question, what is it they intend to accomplish?

    While I don’t think it’s productive to weigh different suffering against one another, I think it’s fair to say that religious/political beliefs and related feelings of marginalization are also quite different from the physical and psychological trauma of sexual assault.

    But the important point here is that this is not some Dutch cartoonist we are talking about, these are people in our community. Given first hand accounts from our peers on this thread, I think it is clear that a lot of people are directly affected by this problem. So why not err on the side of caution–and respect.

  12. The way I see it, these kinds of team names are funny in the same way that dead-baby jokes are funny to some people.
    In many instances, humor is a thin red line (PC). The closer you get to that line the funnier something could be.
    However, once you reach the line or cross it, you better go FAR FAR beyond it that what you have to say or joke about is patently absurd, and the humor is in the absurdity of it.
    Nobody with an understanding of the forms and consequences of, let’s say, rape (generalizing here, i know, just go with it) finds it funny. That said, when something like a team name like “Yes means no, no means anal” touches on the subject, it does so in a way that absurd.
    Rape is an uncomfortable topic, yes. People often laugh to cope with glossed-over uncomfortable topics. I for one refuse to condemn someone that would chuckle at such an absurd take on a serious topic. It’s a way to cope with the absurd.

  13. Would you make a “dead-baby joke” in front of someone that had lost a child? Because that’s the risk you’re taking every time you make a joke about sexual assault. Except for unlike the former, you KNOW that the latter happens to 1/4 women in college and some of them have told you on this thread how much it hurts them…

  14. I am a girl and I laughed out loud really hard when read those team names.

    That is all.

  15. I mean, the issue here isn’t whether these people should be punished by Georgetown. They shouldn’t. Crass, insensitive, offensive, whatever you want to call it, it’s free speech. The correct response is the one done here — engaging in the marketplace of ideas to produce better speech, and let these people know that their speech really does harm some members of the community — clearly, members at trivia at Tombs itself.

    My problem with the team names aren’t so much that they touch offensive subjects; it’s that they’re just so crude and sophomoric. The Heckler had some hilarious takes on these issues — e.g. “Take Back The Night Concedes the Night To Georgetown Cuddler in Solemn Surrender Ceremony,” or “Pride Party Pretty Gay, MSB Bro Reports.” One satirizes the countless simple campus safety messages that are routinely disregarded by students, like locking one’s doors, that allow the Cuddler entry, while the other more makes fun of bros than GU Pride. “No means yes, yes means anal,” is just, well, crude in comparison.

    Listen, bottom line, you want to choose that as your team name? Go right ahead. Hell, slap it on a t-shirt and parade around campus if it makes you feel good. Just know that you’re legitimately traumatizing people on campus who have actually faced sexual assault. Is that worth it for a snickered laugh at Tombs?

  16. @Matt

    Not to get off topic, but does the description of the Cuddler in the first Heckler article remind anyone else of Quaddafi?

    P.S. ReCaptcha is “Existed Hogmen” = MANBEARPIG!!

  17. By that i meant part with the military garb with the white-stained blanket

  18. The biggest problem is that this has turned into a subjective comparison of what groups of people the majority thinks we’re allowed to levy jokes against. Muslims? Vertically challenged People? Women? Sexual abuse victims? People of different races? Large-breasted women in bud light t-shirts?

    So we approach it with an all or nothing mentality. And because no one wants to walk on eggshells forever, we agree that everyone is fair game. And in essense, they are. Laughter is healthy, laughter helps us move on. Laughter is not called the best medicine for no reason. To truly heal or to truly feel comfortable involves being able to one day maybe not laugh at whatever it may be, but to at least not have to run out of a room when the topic comes up.

    We can’t ignore these issues. But they are issues that exist in our most serious intellectual discussions and thus they come up also in our basest of conversations. That involves especially, and I cannot stress this enough, in conversations that aim to garner the highest shock value while picking a team in trivia while drunk at the Tombs on a Monday.

    So if you think we only need to watch ourselves around rape jokes/marginalizing women jokes, you have being incredibly tunnel-visioned to other groups of people who may have been offended by the team names, and if you think we need to avoid any sort of teasing or crass/insensitive team names that offend people, you are planning to prevent people from ever naming a team, because every one of those team names is going to offend someone.

  19. CAN EVERYBODY PLEASE SHUT UP! I”M TRYING TO FALL ASLEEP!!! GAWD!!!

  20. I don’t believe that 1 in 4 women at Georgetown are victims of sexual violence. I think 6 in 10 women at Georgetown, on at least one occassion, drink too much and the next day, regret how they ended their night. Some of them choose to call that sexual violence. But if a guy regrets a drunken hookup, how many people will take it seriously when he says he’s been “victimized”?*

    * There is no evidence that any guy has ever regretted a drunken hookup.

  21. “Those guys were the same ones that hung out at the Tombs for trivia a few years ago and would have been regarded by the commentariat here as awesome bros”

    That’s right. ‘Cause guys who go to Tombs are rapists.

  22. I’m not going to try to tell you that I’m different from all the rest/ I’ve been subject to the same de-structure of desire and I’ve felt the same effects/ I’m a hetero-sexist tragedy/ And potential rapists all are we/ But don’t tell me this is natural.

  23. It’s not that hard to be funny without being blatantly offensive. You go to f*cking Georgetown, you should be able to do better than that.

  24. @ J

    Your language offends me. Please refrain from using profanities. You go to Georgetown.

  25. Pingback: Vox Populi » Comments of the Week: Name Game

  26. To the people who think that rape jokes, jokes that denigrate women, or make light of exploitation, I’m sure you would think otherwise if your mothers, sisters, or girlfriends, had been the victims of these assaults.

  27. “Speech is powerful. It can stir people to action, move them to tears of both joy and sorrow, and—as it did here— inflict great pain. On the facts before us, we cannot react to that pain by punishing the speaker.”

    Supreme Court. Read it, if you can, because you’re a woman.

  28. Honestly this article makes me so angry. A few reasons:

    1. Many things make me angry, offend me, hurt my feelings, or bring up bad experiences. I choose to ignore them, laugh about them, or avoid them. I’m not American, but I live in this country where freedom of speech is a prized ideal. So just on principle, those of you wanting Tombs to moderate team names are being hypocritical, also because I’m entirely sure that you would be the ones protesting censorship in other countries. To me, it doesn’t matter the level of censorship or whether political or not. On those grounds alone, deal with it or don’t go.

    2. I met someone who was going to CAPS to talk about her ‘abusive’ relationship. I learned that this was in fact her having emotional issues because she kept sleeping with her ex-boyfriend when they’d attend the same parties. I highly doubt he forced her to each and every single time. Emotionally and physically, she was responsible for her own behaviour a majority of those times. Reporting that as abuse is what’s actually offensive to people who’ve been through actualy traumatic experiences.

    3. Culture obviously plays a role in our behaviour. Kids absorb the culture that surrounds them at home. Simple. But honestly, by the time you’re at Georgetown, if your behaviour is influenced or validated by team names at Trivia night and that is the catalyst for you to go rape someone or abuse them, then you’ve got other issues and need help. If you think that Trivia night is what makes people do this, you also have problems. I understand that it may perpetuate the idea that this behaviour is okay, but really the people that behave that way don’t need the validation of a Trivia team’s name. Just like the people who objectify women don’t do so because they saw a GUGS shirt which reads ‘Grade A, Size D’.

    4. I agree with everyone who says we laugh at them because they are such bizarrely wrong and offensive ideas. The humour is absurd.

    5. I’m scared for a society where our trivia team names are monitored for appropriateness. It’s just a slippery slope down monitoring so many other things. When do things become inappropriate and offensive? How do you monitor that? That’s taking away someone’s freedom of speech. ‘I may not agree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.’ Boom.

    6. As someone who has been subject to endless taunts about my sexuality and my being a minority, and as someone who has actually been sexually abused, I find these team names hilarious. It’s more offensive and hurtful to me to label myself a victim and cry about it than it is to laugh about it with friends and know that they all think it’s absurdly funny how wrong those jokes are.

    7. I’m more offended by J.Lo singing ‘Vegas to Africa’ in her latest song and still making millions off of it. I hate the totally incorrect use of ‘Africa’ over here.

  29. @Dave Roffman

    I’m assuming from the blog link you’ve posted that you’re a local resident rather than a student, so why are you spending time trolling in such unintelligent fashion? Grow up and get a job. You’re making my Senate Minority-leading mouth get even tighter over here.

    As for the issue at hand – obviously no one except Tombs can censor the team names, but it would be helpful if the people who came up with them saw that they were hurting their classmates’ feelings and toned it down. Our team’s taking it down a peg from now on. Sometimes you do things you’re not required to so you can avoid hurting other people’s feelings.

  30. Does anyone realize that these things are funny because they ARE wrong? It’s called dark humor. If I had a team name like “puppies” “socialized healthcare” or “equal pay for equal work”… who would laugh? No one would. The key to this kind of humor is that it creates discord between the solemn reality and the levity of response. These names find their humor in the fact that they are openly dishonest. Yes, we know no doesn’t mean yes, but it’s amusing to think some idiot would be so disconnected with reality to think it were true. In fact, it’s humor that often allows topics to be discussed with frankness. From child abuse to racism, humor removes the social taboo that comes with discussion. It’s the self-conscious and the afraid who wish to end this kind of humor. It’s not to save anyone else, but to defend their weak social constitution.

    Response 2: You’re at a bar where people are getting drunk and doing silly things. Get over it.

  31. maybe the issue here is not simply the team names, but rather how the website has chosen to glorify and give prestige to the most offensive ones. There is some room for argument that these team names may be in a college bar with insensitive drunk students, who care less about the feelings or experiences of their peers. Thankfully this is America so those of us who find them offensive are allowed to freely judge them for it, those of us who ignorantly believe that there is no issue with these names may also continue to have the team names. However, it is not the individuals who come up with these team names who we should necessarily blame, but VOX for perpetuating and encouraging this commentary even more than it already is in modern society. By giving the highest praise to the most vile and offensive speaks largely to the values of an institution, and perhaps the institution should be scorned.

  32. @GMan and everyone else making that argument.

    I think we should shut down the Tombs and any institution that sells alcohol because it is insensitive to people who have relatives who died of alcoholism, and drinking in front of them is clearly offensive to them.

  33. @Mike

    You’ve converted me. I’m going to the Tombs on Monday, help me choose names. I’m thinking of ‘Whitie, your great grandfather was a slave owner!’. good joke no?

  34. Stupid rich yank cunts, I pity the country u end running ha ha

  35. The problem here is that no, some people don’t know that no doesn’t mean yes. It’s NOT amusing to think that someone would be “so disconnected with reality” to believe such a thing. It’s actually quite horrifying to think that, because that would be rape.

    People don’t laugh because they find the idea absurd. The reason why people wouldn’t laugh at a team name like “puppies” is because it’s not funny, not because it doesn’t break some social taboo.

    Also, child abuse? Do you really think anyone at the Tombs would laugh if your team name was “number of children I molested last week” or some other child molestation joke? Or would that be found offensive? Of course it’s fine when the jokes are about women, but everything else is deemed to be quite offensive.

  36. Just keep in mind that there are a lot more victims of sexual assault or rape around than you realize. They are people you know and people who seem like “normal” Georgetown students. And part of the reason most victims will never talk about it or pursue legal action is the culture that this is promoting. I have a pretty un-PC sense of humor but this is just something that shouldn’t be turned into a joke even more than it already is one.

  37. I can completely appreciate the problem and that this is an issue plaguing our country BUT it’s a college bar, not the white house, and the people who are offended just shouldn’t go there… not everywhere is for everyone, deal with it. You clearly get offended easy and maybe you should just stay at home so you don’t see have to see or hear anything to be offended by. I’m not saying the names are right or wrong but there are much bigger problems than this at Georgetown and maybe all this built up hostility should be directed somewhere else.

  38. I’m sorry; I just can’t remember the last time that I’ve paid to view comedy and none of the material could be construed as offensive.
    When’s the last time any of you have gotten a laugh from reading a joke on the side of a Good Humor popsicle stick? Just because you’re in your twenties doesn’t mean that you need to feign offense with something simply because “sensitive” people do.

  39. Pingback: Vox Populi » What sucks: Trivia returns to Tombs, so lets debate some comedy

  40. For those decrying censorship, I think “Mitch McConnell” and “make it simple” have it right on the money. I don’t deny that the teams have the right to come up with these names, but for them to continue to do so, and for Vox to glorify it, when they know that it can be really damaging to some people is just a matter of simple human decency.

    Side note: those talking about freedom of speech should note that the principle you’re evoking refers to the government regulating speech. I don’t think anyone here is advocating the government regulate trivia night team names. The question is whether individuals or private businesses should participate in, or allow, such horrible sentiments to be given voice.

  41. Pingback: Vox Populi » So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye

  42. Pingback: Vox Populi » What sucks: These are the jokes, people?

  43. OK, but you can you handle these:
    Don’t touch me there, you are not my real priest!
    Lemaize class is a great place to meet girls.
    Pork is a verb.
    Why is my priest wearing an ankle bracelet?
    How can I love you if you won’t lie down?
    Daddy, turn mommy over, I want a puppy.
    Katie Holmes has Stockholm Syndrome.

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