Yesterday, the Healy Clock thieves posted on CollegeCraig, a website for students to buy, sell, and trade items, offering to return the clock hands in exchange for the tall order of Jack Jr. and a negotiable two cents USD. The ransom, posted at 2:50pm on Thursday afternoon, is written as a poem.

“We have your key to make Hoya history/ And since we’re not much for the publicity/ we’ll give it back in double, but don’t want any more trouble. The semester is getting late so stand down/ bring us the dog and wait wait wait,” the poem reads. But he’s just a child!

Jack Jr., also known as J.J., came into the world of Georgetown in late March, and is a mere five months old. He currently resides in New South with Jack the Bulldog and caretaker Rev. Christopher Steck, S.J., and reportedly has a “mellow personality.” Jack Jr. is the mascot-to-be of Georgetown.

Whether or not the university will cave in to these demands is to be seen. For now, the clock hands remain under the stewardship of Reaper, Goliath, and Juliet.

Photo: Julian De La Paz