More than anything else, Vox loves helping its readers. That’s why the Voice‘s ever-friendly advice column is coming to Vox!

Whatever your problem—be it your inability to buy your older lady friends wine, or your hesitance breaking up with your roommate, or your being stuck dressing up as unsexy Dorothy—our resident confidante-columnist Emlyn Crenshaw has you covered.

Submit your questions completely anonymously to Vox before Wednesday at 5 p.m. and Emlyn will have them answered on Friday.

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Note that all submissions become the exclusive property of the Georgetown Voice.

The Washington Post is good at a lot of things: Pulitzer Prize-winning Joshua Bell articles, investigative series on the kind of people who shoot their friends in the face, and reliable coverage of one of the worst teams in all of Major League Baseball. Notably absent from the list: telling freshmen the ways of the world.

Unfortunately, that didn’t stop the Post from running a feature over the weekend called “The Freshman 15: What Every First-Year College Student Needs to Know About Washington.” (Nor did the fact that this is already well-tred ground.) The article puts on full display all the worst qualities of the Post. The advice is at times preachy, inaccurate, and irrelevant. What’s more, they largely repeat what your 50 year-old parents told you on move-in weekend before you managed to escape them.

The worst offenders:

5. Forget the fake ID. The District is where fake IDs go to die. Give it up, McLovin. That expired Hawaii license might have gotten you 30s of Milwaukee’s Best at your local beer shack, but the bouncers in this town have you pegged: You stammer, you sweat and you don’t even know your own fake Zip code. Don’t believe us? Head to the 9:30 club. Test your luck, and let us know how that works out.

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Hey, class of 2012. If you’re hungry for any information you can get about Georgetown, this is your blog.

Vox Populi is the next evolutionary stage of Georgetown’s weekly paper, the Voice. We’ll be having a big freshman week of posts with more detailed advice (alcohol, sex) during orientation. Until then, though, this post should save you some time over the summer and some hassles during your first semester.

Ask any other questions you have in the comments and we’ll help you out. Also, keep checking the blog this summer for more posts about Georgetown and DC.

Q: Do I have to read Before the Frost and write the response paper?

A: No. If that’s your thing, go for it, but nothing bad will happen to you if you don’t. My orientation adviser said that people who don’t do the papers get bad housing lottery numbers for sophomore housing, but the idea that Housing could coordinate that with New Student Orientation is prima facie ridiculous.

This brings up a useful thing to know about NSO and Georgetown life in general: unless alcohol, drugs, criminal activity, or something truly outrageous is involved, Georgetown doesn’t have many ways to punish you for not doing what it wants. This means that you can skip book stuff, convocation, or any other NSO event with impunity.

After the jump, 10 more, plus a bonus.

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